(Photo by Kevin C. Cox/Getty Images)
I have seen Stanley C. Panther up close and personal, and the 56th NHL All Star Game has him beat, by far, in one important category. Clownshoes.
Before I cut loose the barn doors and flat out rant, let me assure you that the game was perhaps the most entertaining midseason exhibition ever. It actually seemed like it meant a little something in the end. It featured a huge comeback by the West, a thrilling late lead change, and the showcasing of Rick Nash the True Stud. It even got the crowd in Atlanta all loud and hollerin’, as their favored Eastern Conference All-Stars buried a final biscuit with 20 seconds left for the win.
Now let’s talk clownshoes. Versus Channel had the bright idea to install some kind of bluetooth voyeur contraption in the goalie masks. Rick DiPietro and Manny Legace were stupid enough to fall for it. We are all enriched this morning, since it was the dumbest use of technology in sports history. Our entire living room exploded in belly laughs and shouts of disbelief. It went down like this.
Doc Emrick decided to start prodding DiPietro for comments as soon as they dropped the puck to start the game. It was a classic WTF moment:
Doc: So there is some talk about you getting banged up in the Skills competition last night. How serious is your injury?
DiPietro: Ah, I’m a little bit nicked but… Oof!
Yes, sportsfans, it’s true. 12 seconds. A new record for the fastest goal in NHL All-Star history, courtesy of the dumbest use of technology in sports history. Later in the game, when the contest was on the line, Legace actually carried on a decent conversation for a while. Then he gave up the tying goal in the middle of his reflections on a future as a sportscaster. Not yet Manny, focus on the puck.
Hilarious, gut-busting, wonderful stuff. Thanks to Versus Channel, thanks to the NHL, thanks to the two netminders who gave us such wonderful memories. A good time was had by all.