Tag Archives: Watchmen squid

Giant Squid Invade San Diego With Huge, Annoying Tentacles!

shumagorath

You may already know. Here at Full Body Transplant we have a thing for the tentacles. Now life imitates art. From Huffington Post, somebody call Hellboy!

SAN DIEGO – Jumbo flying squid — aggressive 5-foot-long sea monsters with razor-sharp beaks and toothy tentacles — have invaded the shallow waters off San Diego, spooking scuba divers and washing up dead on tourist-packed beaches.

The carnivorous calamari, which can grow up to 100 pounds, came up from the depths last week and swarms of them roughed up unsuspecting divers. Some divers report tentacles enveloping their masks and yanking at their cameras and gear.

Stories of too-close encounters with the alien-like cephalopods have chased many veteran divers out of the water and created a whirlwind of excitement among the rest, who are torn between their personal safety and the once-in-a-lifetime chance to swim with the deep-sea giants.

The so-called Humboldt squid are native to the deep waters off Mexico, where they have been known to attack humans and are nicknamed “red devils” for their rust-red coloring and mean streak. Those who dive with them there chum the water with bait and sometimes get in a metal cage or wear chain mail to avoid being lashed by tentacles.

The squid hunt in schools of up to 1,200, can swim up to 15 mph and can skim over the water to escape predators.

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“I wouldn’t go into the water with them for the same reason I wouldn’t walk into a pride of lions on the Serengeti,” said Mike Bear, a local diver. “For all I know, I’m missing the experience of a lifetime.”

The squid are too deep to bother swimmers and surfers, but many longtime divers say they are staying out of the surf until the sea creatures clear out. Yet other divers, including Shanda Magill, couldn’t resist the chance to see the squid up close.

On a recent night, Magill watched in awe as a dozen squid with doleful, expressive eyes circled her group, tapping and patting the divers and gently bumping them before dashing away.

One especially large squid suspended itself motionless in the water about three feet away and peered at her closely, its eyes rolling, before it vanished into the black. A shimmering incandescence rippled along its body, almost as if it were communicating through its skin.

But the next night, things were different: A large squid surprised Magill by hitting her from behind and grabbing at her with its arms, pulling her sideways in the water. The powerful creature ripped her buoyancy hose away from her chest and knocked away her light.

When Magill recovered, she didn’t know which direction was up and at first couldn’t find the hose to help her stay afloat as she surfaced. The squid was gone.

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“I just kicked like crazy. The first thing you think of is, ‘Oh my gosh, I don’t know if I’m going to survive this. If that squid wanted to hurt me, it would have,” she said.

Other divers have reported squid pulling at their masks and gear and roughing them up.

Roger Uzun, a veteran scuba diver and amateur underwater videographer, swam with a swarm of the creatures for about 20 minutes and said they appeared more curious than aggressive. The animals taste with their tentacles, he said, and seemed to be touching him and his wet suit to determine if he was edible.

“As soon as we went underwater and turned on the video lights, there they were. They would ram into you, they kept hitting the back of my head,” he said.

“One got ahold of the video light head and yanked on it for two or three seconds and he was actually trying to take the video light with him,” said Uzun, who later posted a 3-minute video with his underwater footage on YouTube. “It almost knocked the video camera out of my hands.”

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Scientists aren’t sure why the squid, which generally live in deep, tropical waters off Mexico and Central America, are showing up off the Southern California coast — but they are concerned.

In recent years, small numbers have been spotted from California to Sitka, Alaska and are increasingly being spotted off the San Diego coastline — an alarming trend that scientists believe could be caused by anything from global warming to a shortage of food or a decline in the squid’s natural predators.

Their presence off the coast — and the subsequent die-offs — may occur when their prey moves to shallow waters and the squid follow, and then get trapped and confused in the surf, said Hillgarth, who saw a dying squid on the beach last weekend.

“It was an amazing privilege to touch a creature like that and see how amazingly beautiful it was,” she said. “They have these wonderful eyes. … They look all-seeing, all-knowing.”

shumagorath

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Thursday Thirteen: Tantalizing Tentacles.

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In the spirit of the Watchmen squid, we continue our quest for the ultimate aesthetic cephalopod – and it drags us back into the depths of Thursday Thirteen! Enjoy.

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Cephalopod Classics.

strongerlovingworld

That’s the full page of the Watchmen squid, for the uninitiated. Aside from Shuma-Gorath in the Capcom video games, wiggly sucker-filled arms never looked better.

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Today’s inaugural edition of Cephalopod Classics will unveil the six nominees for Top Mythological Tentacles. Vote in the poll, and squirm with us in the comments, if you dare.

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Bring Your Own Squid.

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Life is flavored by perception. An infinite array of information bombards the human instrument at every moment. We carry the parenthesis around in our head, and the filters can be adjusted.

Moral of the story? The tentacles are always there if you choose to see them.

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Watchmen Easter Egg!

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(Easter-colored Watchmen squid by Timberwolf0316.)

A couple days ago, we spoiled the squid-version original comic book ending of Watchmen. Today we reveal it’s subliminal presence in the movie.

You don’t have to take my word for it, shamilton777 dropped it in the comments:

Walter wrote – “When they are scanning the files in the movie, the name of the plan is apparently S.Q.U.I.D.”

The SQUID Acronym also appears in the scene when Dr. Manhattan is videoconferencing with Veidt and transports the Bomb device to Antarctica. (This is the end of the weird multiple hand scene.)

Look at the TV behind Veidt and you’ll see it for a split second. It stands for (something like) Sub Quantum Unifying Intrinsic Device…

And when I caught it during my second viewing of the movie I laughed out loud.

So there you have it.  The giant alien squid who unifies the world has been given a wink and a nod in the film.

Good times.

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More Watchmen Trading Cards.

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Again, these cards are a figment of lastchance’s imagination. They exist in virtual reality, just like the Watchmen movie that no one ever thought could be filmed. Oh yeah, that is now real. From the sound of the response after the first weekend, the film is very successful. Reviews are mixed, as always, and the $55 million first weekend box office seems to be right on the borderline of blockbuster and bust. We shall see if the movie is deemed a big winner in the long run, in the meantime you can groove on some spectacular imaginary cardboard, including the missing squid! Enjoy.

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Watchmen Squid: The Real Ending.

watchmensquid

If you liked the Watchmen movie, you will love the comic book. Especially the psychedelic squid; the original world-uniting custom-designed disaster that saves humanity. Take my word for it, the ending is much better on paper.

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Save-It Saturday: Huge, Annoying Tentacles.

Here at Full Body Transplant we have been getting some sightseers surfing for squid. Watchmen squid, to be precise, but squid nonetheless. So, Save-It Saturday is serving historical calamari this morning as the next recipe in our archival soup.

The photograph at the top of this post is one of the crowning achievements of our time at Metagame. My magnificent Met-loving managing editor actually allowed me to photoshop myself and Matt Hyra into the halls of hysterical fake history. And we lived happily ever after.

So yeah. It’s not the Watchmen squid, it’s the huge, annoying tentacles from Hellboy. It’s copying over to the blog with bad spacing, and eventually the source links from the original will shut down and the images won’t load. It is delicious while it lasts, and there is nothing like squid for breakfast – or Save-It Saturday on a Sunday morning.

Bon appetit!

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Hellboy Preview: Huge, Annoying Tentacles and Karl Ruprecht Kroenen

Rian Fike
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What are you afraid of?

If you are Selma Blair, the answer is simple: Huge, Annoying Tentacles. When she was creating Liz Sherman on film for Guillermo del Toro’s version of Mike Mignola’s Hellboy, Selma had to face her deepest, darkest phobia. This is what the brilliant actress had to say about her experience with Vs. System’s latest Army characters:

They actually scared me. Tentacles are the one thing I have problems with. In person, those tentacles were so terrifying, moving on their own and going everywhere. They really made me sick. I was repulsed, and you didn’t see them as much in the final cut because of it. Yeah, I don’t like them. I don’t like slugs or tentacles or calamari or anything. Tentacles made me turn into a vegetarian in high school. I’m not any more, but in high school, we were dissecting squid.

Huge, Annoying Tentacles scared the pants off the former winner of MTV’s Best Movie Kiss of the Year. Now they are going to be mad fun to play with on the kitchen table and in the tournament hall. They are non-unique Army characters and they are a near-perfect representation of the timeless fear that is unleashed and celebrated in the Hellboy Essential Collection. Let’s find out where these creepy crawlers came from.

When Mike Mignola first penned the legend of Hellboy, he drew upon the most hideous and horrible source material that humanity has ever known. Some of his inspiration was non-fiction, but that will need to wait until the second half of the article. Right now, we need to look toward H.P. Lovecraft.

Widely acknowledged as a master of modern horror, H.P. Lovecraft gave us Cthulhu. No single being carries as much weight when it comes to terrifying its audience. Cthulhu is one of the Old Ones, sometimes described as of the sum total of all human fear. Huge, Annoying Tentacles are its signature move. If you are having trouble pronouncing the name, don’t worry. Cthulhu cannot be spoken. Lovecraft himself explained it like this:

The actual sound—as nearly as human organs could imitate it or human letters record it—may be taken as something like Khlul’-hloo, with the first syllable pronounced gutturally and very thickly. The best approximation one can make is to grunt, bark, or cough the imperfectly formed syllables Cluh-Luh with the tip of the tongue firmly affixed to the roof of the mouth. That is, if one is a human being. Directions for other entities are naturally different.

Mike Mignola created the Ogdru Jahad as homage to Cthulhu and the Old Ones. Like its predecessor, this indescribable evil is an ageless being from the beginning of time. It continuously strives to destroy the world completely and throw us all into a state of utter chaos and madness. When Guillermo del Toro interpreted the Ogdru Jahad for his feature film, it had one resounding characteristic: it had Huge, Annoying Tentacles.

Luckily for us, Hellboy and the B.P.R.D eventually thwarted the Thule Society and their attempt to awaken the Ogdru Jahad. The world did not end, and we get to live on for many more games of Vs. System. For better or worse, there will now be Huge, Annoying Tentacles involved, and they will take some getting used to. Playing against these suckers can be exhausting.

The fear caused by this card turns any lower-cost Thule Society character into Rogue, Anna Raven. Aside from the upgrade in looks, why is that good? What is the benefit in attacking an exhausted character unless it is She-Hulk, Jennifer Walters? I hope you are ready, because there are some amazing powers that can answer those questions.

  1. Exhausted defenders are not able to attack back on your initiative turns. Huge, Annoying Tentacles will form the basis for some suicidal stall strategies. Since it gives its power to any smallish characters that it can team-up with, it has me dusting off the Armies of Qward and preparing a new world order for Army swarms.
  2. Whether or not you stun the defender that you turned sideways, you can stick it to the board for the next turn with Adhesive X or Nahrees.
  3. There are some amazing pumps that key off exhausted defenders. The Arkham Inmates are singing “Let’s Go Crazy” as we speak. Every character in the game is practicing their Sucker Punch for a Crushing Blow thanks to Huge, Annoying Tentacles.
  4. Two words: Golden Death.
  5. Some of the darkest, scariest characters that I know just got a whole lot better. Check out Charaxes, Drury Walker; Yelena Belova ◊ Black Widow; and Mystique, Villainous Shapeshifter. Huge, Annoying Tentacles will bring them out of the binder and turn them into the KO machines they were born to be.

As frightening as Huge, Annoying Tentacles are, there is another card in the Hellboy Essential Collection that takes even more of my breath away. Karl Ruprecht Kroenen will chill you to the bone. He is a character that Mike Mignola invented to personify the coldness and cruelty into which the human mind can condense when its sights are set on true evil. This is what happens when the warmth of the human heart is completely extinguished. The pulp version of Kroenen actually froze himself for years, waiting until the proper time for his apocalyptic agenda to be completed.

Over the course of their translation from comic book to feature film, both Liz Sherman and Karl Ruprecht Kroenen received a major upgrade and an expanded presence in the Hellboy mythos. Guillermo del Toro fleshed them out thoroughly, allowing Liz to love and Kroenen to kill. In the director’s hands, they became a yin/yang supernova of opposite power and symbolism. Their migration to Vs. System in the Hellboy Essential Collection captures these content extensions intact, and our cardboard contests are going to get wicked because of it.

Karl Ruprecht Kroenen is one of the most disturbing villains ever created. The skin-crawling evil that his character distills is nearly non-fiction. The Thule Society team affiliation that he represents is based on tragic historical fact. The bizarre and unsettling psychosis of surgical addiction that he unveils in the cinema is an all-too-real example of abnormal human behavior. This character is a true horror.

He is also nearly impossible to kill. This is neatly represented by his evasion ability. You can be assured of his presence for multiple turns, and at the beginning of each combat phase, he will be prepared to employ one of his twisted toys. If the top card of your deck is an Army character that has been brainwashed to follow the orders of the Thule Society as they continue their mission to ritualistically destroy the entire world, then Karl Ruprecht Kroenen will add it to your arsenal. He may find a natural minion with Huge, Annoying Tentacles, or he may expand his troops with a Team-Up. Either way, he brings a terrible beauty to the tortured eyes of Vs. System Army lovers everywhere.

What are you afraid of?

Rian Fike is also known as stubarnes and he is not afraid of anything that he can eat with hot sauce. He wishes that he really could meet Selma Blair, with or without Matt Hyra. If you wish to speak with him about some fears of your own, make an appointment at fullbodytransplant@dadeschools.net.

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Filed under Comic Books, Save It Saturday, The Interwebs Rock!, Vs. System

The Watchmen Lost Their Squid.

A man with the actual name “Orlando Parfitt” is reporting a bit of a spoiler for the Watchmen movie, although anyone who would not want to know has surely heard by now.

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The Huge, Annoying Tentacles that unite the world at the end of the Watchmen graphic novel? Toast.

Personally, I am bummed. Mostly because of my affinity for drippy trippy squippy things. A comment on the Newsarama announcement of this development contained a sentiment that sums up my remorse.

Spaz_Monkey wrote:

To be fair, the Squid Monster has a definite “Georgia O’Keefe” feel to it, if you know what I mean. I dunno how well that would be translated in the movie.

Spaz Monkey may be correct about the difficulty of filming such a thing, and it would have been tough to get past an “R” rating if they did it right, but I sure would have enjoyed it. Alas, no O’Keefe squidstuff for us. Back to Orlando Parfitt’s interview, shall we?

The big question: What have you got against the squid?!

Zack Snyder: I had a bad calamari experience as a child! Look I’ve got nothing against the squid. When I sat down with the studio and talked about the film, we had to make a decision about what stuff we included and what stuff we wouldn’t. For me Watchmen is all about the characters, whereas if we included the squid, I would have to illustrate it in the story and cut out some of the character. So I wanted more character and less story.

So we came up with something else – no-one knows yet what we’ve done but we hope it’s similar in philosophy to the ending of the graphic novel. I mean the end is all about taking a superhero all the way – you know it’s the bad guy who is the one who wants world peace. It’s a moral dilemma for all the characters involved.

Dave Gibbons: The tone of the graphic novel – the message, the moral ambiguity – has still been left intact. Also it’s not a squid; it’s a fifth dimensional phalymapod!

Fifth dimensional phalymapod, world uniting squid, whatever you want to call it, it is out. Oh well, at least we still have the squishy stuff in Hellboy.

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Finally, for anyone who is seriously bummed out about this inglorious removal of tentacles, just wait until you see how much they need to change when they adapt Alan Moore’s Promethea.

Somehow, we adjust.

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